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We're in the Si Wong Desert now, headed for the library of Wan Shi Tong. We're going to give him the scrolls, so they can be safe from the Iron Empire. We made a huge sign in the spirit world, and we're waiting for the fox spirits to come show us the way to the library. It's all terribly exciting.

I keep thinking about Iluk, though. I know, I know, I shouldn't worry about that. I just can't forget how angry she was, for something that happened 20 years ago. The men we fought in the forest weren't the same men, they weren't even really Chin's men. The Iron Empire has it's own agenda. But she would have killed them all, using that awful blood bending.

I guess what I really keep wondering is: what is it about love that turns sour when it's gone? I can't imagine killing anybody, even if they hurt my family. Oh, I'd be mad, and so so sad. Like when Aunt Kin died. I was so angry with her, even through the grief. How could she leave Kara to deal with so much on her own?

Maybe it is different when the people you love are murdered. But no... Kaizen's family died in a storm, and he's so bitter now. They weren't murdered, but it seems like he needs to blame someone. He blamed the spirits. Then he had that talk with Kara, and now he's saying that destiny means it was his fault, or his family's fault.

Why do things always have to be someone or something's fault? I think Kara didn't really explain it well, but I don't know, 'cause I was asleep until Kaizen started yelling. I don't think I helped, I was so tired, but I didn't want Kaizen to be so mad anymore.

What is destiny? I don't know. Maybe that's something they teach the more advanced students at the Temples. Or maybe I missed that lesson playing Frog-Crane Wrestling with Gyatso and the other kids. I don't know that it's so important. Even with Kara's cards, and her visions, we don't really know what's going to happen to us. We're born, we live, we die. What's in between is really up to us!

It's an adventure! Every day is like a blank scroll, waiting to be filled. And if some force has already written something on that page, then we still have to write the befores and afters.

I know what I'm going to write on my pages. As much good stuff as I can!